Last week I was listening to one of JJ Virginâs podcasts on my way home from work and in passing she made a comment that was something like âWhoa, wait until you hit your 40âs, youâll see!â and then just sort of laughed about it. This certainly wasnât the first time I had heard someone say this, but it was the first time that it actually got me thinking. As a woman in my early 40âs, I actually started to wonder Whatâs Happening to Me? Thinking that immediately thrusted me back to when I was about 7, reading the book that my Mom bought for me, by the same name. I used to pour over that book for hours, studying the pages, learning both what was happening to me and why â which I feel is just as important. I remember one particular section on puberty, where there were time lapsed black and white drawings of a girl transitioning to a woman. It was as if she was standing next to her aging self in a police line-up. Her face was emotionless as she started to develop, very matter of fact, almost telling me not to worry. Having both the visuals and the explanations reduced any anxiety I had building and eliminated the element of surprise as my body started to change. As I sat in my car listening to the podcast, I found myself having those same feelings now. I wondered if there were any drawing of aging women lined up with graying hair and progressively rounded shoulders, longer breasts, and puffier midsections.
I realized that I didnât want to âwait and seeâ as JJ had suggested, I wanted to know now, just like when I was a little girl. Not only is my curiosity peaked, but having the information would also give me a chance to make the necessary changes now to hopefully make the aging process more palpable (or at least try). I donât want to look back when Iâm in my 50âs and say âI wish I had known this, or I should have done that, back when I was in my 40âs.â The information would also help me distinguish between whatâs normal and when I should sound the alarms. Like when I am freaking out that Iâm gaining weight as if I am in a race with a pregnant woman and nothing I do is moving the scale backwardsâŚIs this the result of getting older? Stress? The 3 Oreos and glass of wine I had for dinner last night? or âDâ all of the above?
After a couple of quick searches online, I didnât really find what I was looking for – honest, relatable stories, as if I was talking to a girlfriend over a glass of wine. I was hoping to find more headlines like âYes, Nipple Hair is a âThingâ and 5 Other Signs You Are 40â and less articles like âQuestions About Menopause? Youâve Come to the Right Place.â Well Girlfriend, crack open that bottle of wine and read alongâŚIâve got some answers that you may be looking forâŚ
Help, Iâve Laid Down and I Canât Get up!  About 2 Months ago, I woke up in the morning and was not able to push myself up to get out of bed. My arm was in excruciating pain when I put pressure on it and just ultimately gave out. Iâd like to tell you that it was from a good romp in the hay with my husband, but sadly it was more likely from a good nightâs sleep with my bent arm tucked under my pillow.
Whatâs Happening to Me? Turns out that as we age, our ligaments and tendons that hold our joints together become âstiff and leatheryâ which is what is causing the aching and soreness that I am, more often than not, feeling when I wake up. The Solution: Strength training! According to orthopedic surgeon Stephanie Siegrist, MD, author of Know Your Bones (love the title), strengthening the muscles that cross your joints helps them act more effectively as stabilizers. Resistance exercises such as interval training or weight-training are critical at this point in life. Stretching is also vital to preventing aches and pains because it improves the flexibility of the ligaments that support the joints. No gym membership? No problem! Just recently, I discovered a wealth of free videos on YouTube, including Lesley Fightmasterâs (real name, real badass) yoga videos https://www.youtube.com/user/lesleyfightmaster, which are pretty great. She has video classes from beginners to the âveteran yogiâ and uploads new videos every week. If nothing else, she can just get you started.
Bone-lessâŚMy husbandâs mother had osteoporosis, and suffered from two pretty bad fractures in the latter part of her life. At the time, I didnât fully understand what osteoporosis was, I just associated it with old women and that I didnât need to worry about it. Whatâs Happening to Me? I had no idea that after about the age 35, we start to lose density in our bones. For some, like my mother-in-law, that can lead to osteoporosis, a condition in which the bones become so porous that they easily break. According to Tina Woodley, author of Every Day, One Day Younger, we can lose up to 1% to 2% of bone each year. While this doesnât seem mathematically possible, it does give me pause. The Solution: More exercise! Strength training and weight-bearing exercise not only stops bone lose, but it can actually build bones as well as making them stronger and denser.
Who Doesnât Like Muffins? Over the last 6+ months I have gained over 10 pounds, which has created this âmuffin topâ that hangs over the top of my pants. While a good muffin makes my mouth water, this one is bringing tears to my eyes. I am at a weight that I have not seen in over 8 years and I am getting very discouraged. In the past I could just amp-up my workout and after a few weeks Iâd be able to zip up my pants and be back to my old self. These days I feel like whatever I do is actually making it worse! I trained for a half marathon and actually gained weight â how does that happen??? I am thankful for the styles from the 80âs and 90âs making a strong comeback, as the leggings and tunic tops are giving me some time to figure out how to deal with this change. Whatâs Happening to Me? Beginning around 40, women (and men) begin to lose muscle tissue (by about an average of ½ lb per year). When we lose muscle, our resting metabolism also drops. Which means that when our body is performing its essential functions, like breathing, we burn fewer calories, which leads to weight gain. If that werenât enough, the weight gain is generally concentrated in the belly area (referred to as a âmenopotâ â awful!). So when we put on our (what were once flattering but are now âbreathing-is-optionalâ) jeans and look in the mirror, we now have a roll of fat spilling over the top of our jeans like the crumble top on a blueberry muffin. Muscle loss also leads to generally lower physical energy, makes us more susceptible to getting sick, and accelerates the aging process â yikes! The Solution: Well breathe easy, because similar to helping aches and pains and building bones, strength training will also help combat age-related muscle loss and help boost metabolism. Smart eating is also essential, with more focus on more healthy fats and protein and less focus on refined and processed carbs, and alcohol (booooooâŚâŚ).
Anyone Have Two 5âs for a 10? Going through âthe big changeâ is inevitable, and there is not much we can do to stop that. While I think (hope) that I am still a few years away, I recently found myself writing a letter to the customer service department at Under Amour asking if they would consider making a line of pajamas using their sweat wicking material. Whatâs Happening to Me? Women start this phase of their life with the perimenopause cycle, usually around 45. As our estrogen levels start to decline, we can expect night sweats (UA PJâs sounds awesome now, right?!!), hot flashes and vaginal drynessâŚsounds like Arizona – Donât worry, itâs a dry heat. Other physical symptoms include hair loss (usually on your head) and unwanted hair growth (nipples, anyone?). If the physical changes werenât enough, we should also expect emotional symptoms like anxiety, fuzzy thinking, mood swings and anger.  The Solution: KY Jelly, laser hair removal, an industrial portable fan and the number to a good therapist for your loved ones.
Hug Me! From all that I have learned through researching this post, the thought of crawling up into a ball and waiting for it to be over looks really attractive. But I would argue that embracing this time in my life, as gracefully as possible, is the better way to go. While I have spent most of the time here focusing on the physical side, the emotional side is just as important. Whatâs Happening to Me? I have noticed a big POSITIVE change in how I view myself from an emotional standpoint. As I have come into my 40âs, I certainly have become more confident and less apologetic about who I am. I am who I am, and I am not sorry about that. Long gone are the days where I sacrifice my own happiness for others, usually out of feelings of obligation, or some twisted perception of what is the right thing to do for acceptance of others â and I couldnât be happier! The Solution: Unlike that little girl in the drawings, who didnât appear to have much of a choice in how her body and mind would develop, I now know that I have choices from here…and I canât wait.